העורך Editor

Hey Marrano: Forget Aliyah! Just Camouflage Your Mezuzah!

In Europe, soaring antisemitism popularizes a new invention by Irish Rabbi Zalman Lent: The camouflaged mezuzah, disguised to resemble an alarm sensor!

A swell article showcasing the best invention since sliced government cheese on Times of Israel here…

The Camozuzah is made of rubber and has two models, a large and a small one, both available in white and black. The case costs about $20 and it features a fake indication light that resembles an alarm sensor. The parchment is fitted into the case at an angle but the case stands parallel to the doorframe, avoiding the giveaway of a tilted box on the doorframe.

My favorite excerpt:

Nifty and kosher though it is, the Camozuzah prompted some criticism during its unveiling, Lent said. “When we first showcased the Camozuzah to other Chabad rabbis, some of them objected, saying it was the opposite of the Chabad message of promoting a proud and visible Judaism,” Lent recalled.

Yet the increase in expressions of Jew-hatred in Europe and beyond means that a growing number of Jews will not have any mezuzah, he said. “Of course we encourage Jewish pride and a visible mezuzah where possible, but far better to have a hidden mezuzah than not to have one at all,” Lent added.

What piercing logic: better something than nothing! (or: 1>0. QED.)

Nu, what are you waiting for? See, a (camouflaged) Mezuzah can still protect (camouflaged) Jews! So, cover your yarmulke with a baseball cap, and run out to buy it!

Speaking of protection, perhaps one small suggestion can be forgiven: Can they add the words”שומר דלתות ישראל” (in miniature font, translated into ancient hieroglyphics, of course)?

I can’t even envision Rabbi Lent’s next star product! Makom habris, maybe?

P.S., Now, “Lent” doesn’t sound like a Jewish surname, either. Hmmm, I wonder if…